In my short life of 17 years I could say that I’ve never experienced these feelings of “love,” and “betrayal” until one year. I was a junior and she a freshman, I’ve never met her, and we’ve only talked through mutual means, I attending a different school and she another. Making a mental note I recall my sheer audacity that I get out of my old school. However unknowingly to me the mark I left behind in my previous school was perhaps the entire reason for her making the effort to speak to me, interesting how she made such an endeavor to be my friend, so I feeling rather alone and unaccompanied at my new school decided to accept her shot at friendship. We’d talk about diminutive things at first and to me it seemed that she was just an average girl. But I probing her profile on this social network we called home proved to me that my interest in her simply wasn’t just for amusement of hearing a young girl complain, and at that moment I found myself oddly intrigued, but as I always do I disregarded these feelings and continued my academic life.

            Loneliness often shares its time with depression and they both will eventually dissolve you. Well things weren’t going well at my new school; the feelings of solitary eventually got and ate away at me, and I had to just get out of there and back into my element. So I made the arrangements to return to the former institution of schooling that I had made such an effort to leave. Once all preparations were made I arrived. Feelings of blissful ignorance filled me, everything was just what it was before, and at least I thought so. Here I am feeling rather ecstatic that I’m back living my life with animosity and then one day the girl whom I would ultimately give my entire soul to met, and from that event we became friends. This continued for a couple of months, and then one day I sulking in feelings of disparity decided that, “Hey! I like this girl! And it seems that she likes me too?” So began my effort to make us more than friends, well needless to say I succeeded, and for and entire year we were collectively in each others embrace. It seemed that this feeling of euphoria would never leave; I was in a state of nirvana that I had found her; nay we had found each other. Everything that we’ve had said seemed to melt into the very core of my existence, we planned everything, where we’d go after she graduates, what colleges we’d attend, when we were going to get married, and even the names of our future children. Everything seemed so right that the sheer thought of us ending was a catastrophe to me. But soon my fictional ruin became a reality.

            Relationships are so fragile and in just a short moment of divergence can end, you see we had and argument, and in the night of our hostility we didn’t talk for 4 days, and in those 4 days I took a look at myself and how I could better myself, for my part of our relationship, and I feeling in high spirits that she’d be happy with what I changed would talk soon and forgive and forget, but boy was I wrong, in those short 4 days she had completely changed who and what she was, she became more welcoming to random people and begun “living the single life” and here I am thinking “that our love would be the shining light that pulls us trough the darkness of conflict,” am waiting for her and I soon find out what she had done, I disbelieving it at first disregarded it as a need for attention, decided to confront her on it, and so I rushed as fast as my feet would allow me see her, bringing only my love, unfortunately my efforts of us making aments were derailed by a surprise to see that she had become that completely different person I had so dreaded. My moment of fret had me on my knees, tears running down my face, begging her pleading with her, only to have her look at me with such cold eyes say, “I’m sorry” and in a last ditch attempt I looked at her and said, “What’s wrong with me?” her answer. “You love me to much…” I was torn. All throughout our relationship she had led me to believe that I loving her with my entire heart and soul was the reason that she had stayed with me throughout all these times, but no I had fallen in love with someone whom could never love me back.

            So we ask ourselves, what is love? What is betrayal? I believe that they both go hand and hand, perhaps that one can not survive without the other it’s a sad and horrific fact but you must learn what true betrayal is to fully know love, you must have your heart ripped from the very confines of your soul to know what love is, you must learn that pain is forever and that even when you find the person that you think will love you forever that you could always be wrong. When you look at all these “happy” couples you long and wish for what was once yours but you may never have what they have, my advice? Be wary of whom you love.